First the moron toothbrush companies with too much cash brought out the crazy toothbrushes with whirling electric heads, vibrating dental floss holders and fading wear indicators. Now the mens’ shaving razor market has gone berserk. Look at this crap:
It used to be that two blades provided the smoothest, closest shave. Then it was three and then four blades, then the razor went red and had “turbo” in its name.
But now there’s a MOTOR in the razor, and it also gets a three-tiered name:
- A name that is shared with a prestige German sportscar that’s on my list of would-owns
- The word power - everyone likes power
- The word “Nitro”, a type of high octane fuel used in dragsters and remote-controlled cars (lol not so tough now)
Three names…now that’s tough. What’s also tough is that it’s black with glowing bits and it has a motor! It’s in the handle. You push the button to turn it on. Listen to that again:
Push the button. Turn it on.
Then what? Well who knows? Your lady might go crazy when you push her button and turn her on but the TV ad just doesn’t say what’s next. The magazine ad doesn’t say. But it definitely has a “tiny motor in the handle”. All that I can imagine is that you go about your business while the pointless motor does nothing. Sounds like my old RX7 actually.
And you know what else? The car used in the ads is a Toyota Supra. Wouldn’t it make sense, if you’re going to use a car to demonstrate the awesoma poewr of your razor with a tiny motor in the handle wouldn’t you use the one that your razor seems to be named after? Yes the BMW M3. What an awesome co-branding deal they could have made; buy two M3 razors and get a free BMW M3! That’s a saving of $139,980! What a deal.
I hate this razor so much I almost want to buy it just to piss people off with the story.